MAIN CHARACTER POWER
Image: Naomi Campbell by Inez & Vinoodh
Behind the scenes of Benshen.co this last week, we took a longer time than usual dissecting and discussing motivational speaker, Jim Rohn’s eighth Power To Be Great—it’s character, by the way. Perhaps this was because defining character isn’t straightforward but it is profoundly important. Interestingly enough, it comes from a Greek word meaning ‘to chisel’, or the mark left from a chisel. “You’ve got to chisel your character out of the raw material of yourself,” Jim says. “Just like a sculptor has to create a statue…Everything that happens to you, good or bad, is an opportunity for building your character.” Then we took a look at the dictionary, defining character as “the mental or moral qualities distinctive to an individual.” Character and integrity are not something intrinsic within us, so it is up to us to develop it into a strong muscle. The thing is, it's a lifelong practice of building our character from the raw material we’ve got, and allow it to speak for itself when we’re making decisions, fostering relationships, and creating what we want. Character is so inherently tied up in trust, between ourselves and others. Trust is one of the most powerful things on the planet, which takes years to build and a moment to dash away, all the more reason that the small habits and behaviors we do every day are essential for building integrity and confidence into our character, which radiates into the world.
And why is that important? Because when we have trust in ourselves through building integrity, it ultimately pours out to our peers, our community, and people beyond our direct circles, we live a more powerful and connected life, bringing us closer to our visions without time, money, and other resources being sucked away. In The Speed of Trust, Stephen Covey says: “There are no moral shortcuts in the game of business—or life. There are, basically, three kinds of people: the unsuccessful, the temporarily successful, and those who become and remain successful. The difference is character.”
When we look at character through this lens, it means showing up with the best intentions and not taking shortcuts, whether that means secretly cutting corners in business to save money dishonestly or lying in relationships to save ourselves rather than honoring each other.
Character isn’t about being the most likable person in the room or the most agreeable, but about being consistent and honorable in our actions—it’s when we choose to be clear about our purpose in life and having the integrity to move through our choices guided by that purpose. It’s not always the most natural, and our natural ego tendencies might get in the way, but that’s what character is, this anchor to always strive for and go back to because the raw material is always there. Because the incredible thing is character speaks for itself. When we are known for our character and integrity and we’ve shown up enough in a way that people believe who we say we are…then when amazing opportunities arise, we’ll be the first one they think of. As Carla Harris once said, “The most important decisions about us will be made when we're not in the room.”
When we have strong character and integrity, we won’t even have to be in the room—our character will expand past physical boundaries because we are trustworthy enough to rise to the occasion, whatever that may be. In this newsletter, we will discuss a strategy to return to our integrity and character, and showcase our authenticity and dedication to our higher purpose.
“Authenticity: Your authenticity is at the heart of your power and at the heart of your powerful, impactful leadership.”
— CARLA HARRIS
Image: Floris Neusüss, Tellerbild, 1970
EXERCISE:
BUILD THE BLUEPRINT OF YOUR CHARACTER
The question with chiseling and polishing our own character becomes: WHO are we really and how do we want to show up in the world. First, it’s important to retrace our steps back to our higher purpose (outlined in Jim Rohn’s first “Power To Be Great”) From there, with a clear and defined purpose in hand, we can start to observe our behaviors to see if they really live in accordance to who we want to be, who we want our character to stand for. These are major life questions, so we can take a step back and be the observer this week, starting one step at a time. What’s something we might have on the agenda this week: an appointment, an important conversation, a project? How can we use this as an opportunity to foster trust (in ourselves, in others) by going through the task–no matter how mundane it might be–through the lens of maintaining our character and building trust, taking no shortcuts and showing up fully?
This reminds us of two powerful Carla Harris quotes: "Build trust. This happens when you deliver results over and over again" and “You have to keep consistency if you want to see the outcomes.”
EXERCISE: This week, pick an action item to accomplish and see it through the lens of shining a light on our character. Ask: how can we be the most consistent and trustworthy (to ourselves and others) person possible through this task, and how does us taking that step effect the way others see us and our future standing?
Remember: It’s important not to do things merely so that others see us in a “good” light…that will only lead us to confuse character with inauthenticity and/or people pleasing for the sake of approval. Instead how can we bring clarity to who we are, put up boundaries when necessary so we can keep our word and be clear with what we say and what we mean, so that, ultimately WE trust OURSELVES and others have a crystal clear picture of our character.
“Character isn’t something you were born with and can’t change, like your fingerprints. It’s something you weren’t born with and must take responsibility for forming.”
— JIM ROHN
Image: Peter Zumthor