This is a loaded question and I’ve got to tell you, I’ve tried it all. Figuring out how to increase feminine energy and radiance - essentially meaning that magnetic, glowing quality that oozes when a woman is in her power - is my reason for living, breathing, and waking up each morning. It’s what fuels every choice I make and every thing I do, every single day.
First of all, I don’t think we have to really increase our feminine energy - it’s already there , deep down ladies, just waiting for us to let it out. However, we’re often taught to suppress our femininity, our beauty, and our power for fear of one thing - being too much. But as Betsy Prioleau says in her book Seductress, “Too muchness was the goddess’s signature, ‘ all that’s fascinating, terrible [and] overpowering.’ They kept things in motion and throw off électricité, the star power that sends shock waves through a room.”
So the first step is deciding and declaring, to yourself, that from this point on you’re no longer going to hide from the world. You’re going to walk tall, stand proud, and sashay about town and through the world without fear. It really takes that moment of making a choice to be seen to begin to shift from insecurity to radiant. Most women are just so afraid to be seen that they dim their own light. What if you decided that it was not only okay to be beautiful, powerful, successful, feminine, and radiant?
But more importantly, what if you decided that actually, it wasn’t really as big of a deal as it seems? That all of these qualities, when inhabited, are actually a whole lot of fun to live from. To be able to smile and chat up anyone. To be able to walk into a board room meeting with the confidence of Rihanna. To be able to go on a first date and feel like Venus after just emerging from her half shell. To feel not only okay with success but to marinate in it, enjoy it, and feel confident about your finances and ability to live out the life you desire.
The keys are many and I will go over these throughout the Q and A, but it really takes a few simple steps to get started. The most important being learning how to marinate in beauty.
One of the things I live by is that your home is where you marinate, the palace where we spend most of our time and energy. So essentially, over the last year or so, I’ve made my home into an Alter to Venus. What most women don’t realize, or if they do, they don't practice it, it that beauty, femininity, and radiance comes from slowness..from cultivating…from marinating. Not from running around like a crazy person, blowing off hormones until the next incarnation and back. So if you understand that femininity comes from this golden, sticky, slowness, reminiscent of honey, you’ll appreciate the art of marinating. And the best place to marinate is right in your own home, thinking of it more as the shell that Venus resides in rather than the place you go home to to binge on Real Housewives in sweatpants (yes, I’m talking to you).
When I realized all of this, i got to work. I bought the best furniture I could afford. The most luxurious sheets. Beautiful candles to light at night. I began purchasing bouquets of flowers weekly and do floral arrangements in my home. i put fresh bouquets of Eucalyptus in my shower so it feels like i’m bathing in Ancient Rome. I take cold showers and scrub my face with raw honey, like the Greek Goddesses once did. At home, my hair is down and my silk lingerie is on. I eat dark chocolate with fresh raspberries while watching movies like Dangerous Beauty in candle-light. So often we think we have to fix ourselves back to our femininity and radiance but I think we have to learn to let go and enjoy ourselves, bringing more beauty and pleasure into our lives. Pleasure is the greatest aphrodisiac on the planet, the energy that creates a whirlpool of vitality within and around a woman. So get off the self-help blogs and put the fix-me-up books and start having a little more fun.